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TWO LEFT FEET - well i’ll sing you a little song, short and sweet / straight faced johnny had two left feet / he went to the dance, picked out a girl / pretty red dress, hair all curled / she stepped up, she got down / little did he know she was the fastest in the town / she danced high, she danced low / straight faced johnny had nowhere to go / she danced the mashed potato, boogaloo too / straight faced johnny didn’t know what to do / she kept dancin', he just stood / planted like a tree in the piney wood / the band was bangin’ a mambo beat / straight faced johnny had two left feet / they played ’til dawn, they cleared the floor / all except johnny and the girl next door / him still standin’, she goin’ strong / dancin’ to the rhythm of a conga drum / the band packed up, the band went home johnny and the girl was left all alone / she danced off, he turned in / johnny never saw the girl again / but johnny kept thinkin’ about what he saw / pretty red dress burnin’ up the floor / now he’s out dancin’ every saturday night / one foot left, one foot right